After a long time I opened this blog, don’t know what damn was wrong with me but never felt like opening it and putting my thoughts but finally opened it as a part of my new year resolution. I am aware as every New Year resolution is only meant to broken but it’s my thoughts which are actually pushing me continuously to put it in words or put it somewhere so that I can get rid of those.
Last few days or I will rather state it as months I was thinking about a slogan or a theme we have been taught from our childhood “BELIEVE IN YOURSLEF”.
We all are aware of this but somehow I feel people are actually opting this in their life and forgetting the slogan “BELIEVE IN OTHERS”. Are we really so much busy with our life that we actually don’t have time to trust other people? Not sure about the other people but one thing for sure, the list of people I trust are getting small day by day and really giving me hard feeling as will there be a time when I will not be trusting the others. As no more people to trust so chances are getting back stab will be a BIG ZERO.
As believing in yourself slogan doesn’t say explicitly that we are not suppose to trust others.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
My Dream
Today’s morning was a bit strange for me; my eyes suddenly got opened while I was having a terrible dream. No one was around as always every one left for the office and I again slept more than required, damn it. I really hate this part of me. Any way I was talking about my dream. A dream, given a choice I will never prefer. In that dream I saw a person who look alike me (I will prefer to encounter that person as me.) and realized that whole my cloths are wretched, my hair style turn into a big time puzzle (tough part was I don’t know how to start solving those), my lips were asking for the water as they haven’t sipped it since long, my eyes were itching like any thing and a beam of light is continuously hitting my eye balls.., it felt like I am having terrible allergy… Huhhhhhhhhhh
Quite tough and uncomfortable to handle all these, may be because of this my conscious asked me to come out of dream. I felt relaxed as I came out of my dream, I immediately ran towards my mirror and tried to figure out how I am looking right now, while giving a glance in mirror I can still figure out the same pain in my face, tried to give a nice morning smile to me but all in vain…It took me more than 10 minutes to come up with my so called sophisticated smile and ridding off from that tensed look. Finally I succeeded. J
Felt like finally I got rid of that look, is it? Is it really me whom I saw in that dream or a person with same height and same gesture or one of look alike?
Gosh… suddenly heard some thing about inner beauty, I got stuck in a long time thought process as is it my inner chapter (I used chapter because it could be one of the phase of my life.) which I don’t want to reveal to the world? Even though I wear clothes every day, even though I put my hair in proper way (I don’t remember exactly why every time I put the same hair style) so that I may look cool, even though I put my pair of spectacles. But when I sit in front of computer it just felt like is it that what I always wish to do in my life? Is it the same clothes, same hair style and same set of spectacles I always wanted to wear.. I know I never want to look the same but as per my current life I need to follow it as every body around the world following the same. I don’t know whether I have a quality to depict the dream (May be in future I will get a boon to depict the same, can’t say) but one thing for sure is, if it is really my inner self which I saw in dream, then I am really ashamed of myself.
Quite tough and uncomfortable to handle all these, may be because of this my conscious asked me to come out of dream. I felt relaxed as I came out of my dream, I immediately ran towards my mirror and tried to figure out how I am looking right now, while giving a glance in mirror I can still figure out the same pain in my face, tried to give a nice morning smile to me but all in vain…It took me more than 10 minutes to come up with my so called sophisticated smile and ridding off from that tensed look. Finally I succeeded. J
Felt like finally I got rid of that look, is it? Is it really me whom I saw in that dream or a person with same height and same gesture or one of look alike?
Gosh… suddenly heard some thing about inner beauty, I got stuck in a long time thought process as is it my inner chapter (I used chapter because it could be one of the phase of my life.) which I don’t want to reveal to the world? Even though I wear clothes every day, even though I put my hair in proper way (I don’t remember exactly why every time I put the same hair style) so that I may look cool, even though I put my pair of spectacles. But when I sit in front of computer it just felt like is it that what I always wish to do in my life? Is it the same clothes, same hair style and same set of spectacles I always wanted to wear.. I know I never want to look the same but as per my current life I need to follow it as every body around the world following the same. I don’t know whether I have a quality to depict the dream (May be in future I will get a boon to depict the same, can’t say) but one thing for sure is, if it is really my inner self which I saw in dream, then I am really ashamed of myself.
Friday, April 17, 2009
A Woman and A Cold Drink
From the last few days no work came my way and that gave me much needed time to think about myself. So lot of thoughts poured in and I never realized that there exist numerous things which never caught my attention. As said, I was so swamped with work in the last few years; I could never find time for myself. I am bit skeptical about where to begin with and which thought to pen down first, so that it remains immortal.
Writing a blog was the last thing I ever considered because I had lots of friends around to share my thoughts with, ever irrelevant ones (most of them were, though) but these days it is so difficult to find any listening ear for my words as everyone is stuck up with their own life’s peculiarities and issues. All of a sudden, life has takes such a drastic change that I can’t even imagine to compare with the life I had earlier. I am in the adult world now where everyone is busy in rat race to accomplish the need of daily bread and butter. Had I known that this is the cost I have to pay to sustain in grown up world, I would have preferred to stay that innocent and unaware child, free from worries, free from dubious people.
Another reason for not writing a blog was that I am not sure of my writing skills and always get scared about the reactions I might get from the readers. Putting away my fears, I resolved to write it up and start a journey to find strangers who might find it interesting and nod with me on what I write. I will appreciate those who will be honest in their replies – be it bricks or bouquets. In true sense, I would like to be corrected on how I should perceive life, if I am at mistake and also get right guidance to live it. This is just what my friends used to do, who were immune to my English skills and lend ear to listen my thoughts.
This being my first blog entry, I am more concerned about what should I suppose to put. Should it be something that strikes my mind or some experience I have had, during journey so far?
So with the first entry I decided to share a story I read in my school days in a news paper in 1994(I was in 6th standard then). That story was not that good but I still remember it because it taught me a lesson which I have been following since then and it all shrinks to one line – “think before you spend money”. Story goes like this - a woman from lower middle class, used to earn around Rs. 100, which I think wasn’t a very decent amount that time. Her husband, who died in an accident, left her with 3 kids. She used to spend money cautiously and avoided spending it on luxury items. One day when she was on her way back to home from office, she saw a shop serving cold drinks. She realized that it’s been long since she last enjoyed the cold drink along with samosa. This led her to think that why and for whom she is earning. Doesn’t she have a right to spend few bucks on her? She finally decided to give herself a small treat. She proudly ordered one samosa and a cold drink preferably “Gold spot”. She remembered that this was the brand which she always asked her father to offer her.
She paid 6 Rs for this and the moment she started to have those suddenly she realized the significance and importance of those 6 Rs, she started to thinking about all those stuff which can be done from these 6 Rs. Her son was asking for a new pen and first daughter want a new note book, her second daughter was very fond of one fancy hair band but she never took it as its cost was around Rs. 1. She always preferred to buy a rubber band rather than the hair band as it used to be costly for her. Even she can buy some house hold items which she generally doesn’t prefer because of the cost. She even thought that from this amount she can also buy a bit costlier vegetables rather than sticking with potatoes and onions every time so that her family can have a better food and one of the memorable evening. She suddenly realized that how can she be so selfish. How could she afford to waste her money like this? How can she forget that from those 6 Rs. she can serve her family in a better way? How could it possible she never thought about all this before taking a sip of that cold drink?
Cold drink hmmmmm… after realizing all this, now cold drink felt like a hop cup of soup, it was bitter in taste, even felt like she is having the ugliest drink in the world. That samosa doesn’t have any taste at all. All in all grabbing those items were the toughest moment of her life in last few years.
Somehow she managed to finish those as soon as she can afford to do. The moment she finished her meal she ran like she saw some ghost. A run which is not going to follow the same path which tend towards that cold drink shop rather say any other cold drink shop and she was continuously cursing herself like a hell.
This was the end of the story. I still feel like I am sticking with that woman’s nature and following the same trend as not to waste money anyway, but last few incidents in my life just compel led me to rethink about the way I used to think. Is spending money on things you like are the waste of money? Don’t any humans have the right to spend money on the pleasure things they like as they always wished to do once in the life time. Is spending money on the things which gives you pleasure is wrong? Final point that hits my mind madly is, it’s me who is earning the money and for whom I am earning those one if I can’t make myself happy. Is being selfish for a time being is that bad?? I wish I can be on any of the above ground so that at least doing in any of either ways will make me feel happy.
Writing a blog was the last thing I ever considered because I had lots of friends around to share my thoughts with, ever irrelevant ones (most of them were, though) but these days it is so difficult to find any listening ear for my words as everyone is stuck up with their own life’s peculiarities and issues. All of a sudden, life has takes such a drastic change that I can’t even imagine to compare with the life I had earlier. I am in the adult world now where everyone is busy in rat race to accomplish the need of daily bread and butter. Had I known that this is the cost I have to pay to sustain in grown up world, I would have preferred to stay that innocent and unaware child, free from worries, free from dubious people.
Another reason for not writing a blog was that I am not sure of my writing skills and always get scared about the reactions I might get from the readers. Putting away my fears, I resolved to write it up and start a journey to find strangers who might find it interesting and nod with me on what I write. I will appreciate those who will be honest in their replies – be it bricks or bouquets. In true sense, I would like to be corrected on how I should perceive life, if I am at mistake and also get right guidance to live it. This is just what my friends used to do, who were immune to my English skills and lend ear to listen my thoughts.
This being my first blog entry, I am more concerned about what should I suppose to put. Should it be something that strikes my mind or some experience I have had, during journey so far?
So with the first entry I decided to share a story I read in my school days in a news paper in 1994(I was in 6th standard then). That story was not that good but I still remember it because it taught me a lesson which I have been following since then and it all shrinks to one line – “think before you spend money”. Story goes like this - a woman from lower middle class, used to earn around Rs. 100, which I think wasn’t a very decent amount that time. Her husband, who died in an accident, left her with 3 kids. She used to spend money cautiously and avoided spending it on luxury items. One day when she was on her way back to home from office, she saw a shop serving cold drinks. She realized that it’s been long since she last enjoyed the cold drink along with samosa. This led her to think that why and for whom she is earning. Doesn’t she have a right to spend few bucks on her? She finally decided to give herself a small treat. She proudly ordered one samosa and a cold drink preferably “Gold spot”. She remembered that this was the brand which she always asked her father to offer her.
She paid 6 Rs for this and the moment she started to have those suddenly she realized the significance and importance of those 6 Rs, she started to thinking about all those stuff which can be done from these 6 Rs. Her son was asking for a new pen and first daughter want a new note book, her second daughter was very fond of one fancy hair band but she never took it as its cost was around Rs. 1. She always preferred to buy a rubber band rather than the hair band as it used to be costly for her. Even she can buy some house hold items which she generally doesn’t prefer because of the cost. She even thought that from this amount she can also buy a bit costlier vegetables rather than sticking with potatoes and onions every time so that her family can have a better food and one of the memorable evening. She suddenly realized that how can she be so selfish. How could she afford to waste her money like this? How can she forget that from those 6 Rs. she can serve her family in a better way? How could it possible she never thought about all this before taking a sip of that cold drink?
Cold drink hmmmmm… after realizing all this, now cold drink felt like a hop cup of soup, it was bitter in taste, even felt like she is having the ugliest drink in the world. That samosa doesn’t have any taste at all. All in all grabbing those items were the toughest moment of her life in last few years.
Somehow she managed to finish those as soon as she can afford to do. The moment she finished her meal she ran like she saw some ghost. A run which is not going to follow the same path which tend towards that cold drink shop rather say any other cold drink shop and she was continuously cursing herself like a hell.
This was the end of the story. I still feel like I am sticking with that woman’s nature and following the same trend as not to waste money anyway, but last few incidents in my life just compel led me to rethink about the way I used to think. Is spending money on things you like are the waste of money? Don’t any humans have the right to spend money on the pleasure things they like as they always wished to do once in the life time. Is spending money on the things which gives you pleasure is wrong? Final point that hits my mind madly is, it’s me who is earning the money and for whom I am earning those one if I can’t make myself happy. Is being selfish for a time being is that bad?? I wish I can be on any of the above ground so that at least doing in any of either ways will make me feel happy.
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